SPOILER ALERT: This story contains spoilers for “Kitty Likes to Dance,” Season 3 Episode 4 of “Euphoria,” now streaming on HBO Max.
Three episodes in, and this season of “Euphoria” has already been a doozy. Just last week, Cassie (Sydney Sweeney) and Nate (Jacob Elordi) had their wedding, which ended in the groom violently losing a little piggy; we learned more about Jules (Hunter Schafer) and her sugar-daddy situation; and a gun-running Rue (Zendaya) got stopped by the DEA. Let’s dive into this week’s chaos.
Wow, Rue seems screwed!
She’s trying to play it cool during the DEA interrogation, but the minute Laurie (Martha Kelly) came up, things got terrible, and Rue was facing decades in prison very quickly. Of course, now she’s going to rat out Laurie and Alamo (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) for the feds…how stressful!
Cassie is going to let Maddy (Alexa Demie) blow up her OnlyFans.
Cassie is so sick of the $1 million (!) that Nate owes that she’s now determined to make money fast using the internet. She even consented to a makeover to take her from “the suburbs to the city” — complete with a celebratory “Welcome to Hollywood” montage!
Lexi (Maude Apatow) commissioned Jules to paint for the background of her show, but it was filled with 14 penises.
Sorry, Jules — this isn’t HBO! Can’t do that on network television. Kudos to Patricia (Sharon Stone) for being honest with Lexi about how much it screwed up the production.
Cringe at a NSFW scene in the champagne room with Kitty (Anna Van Patten), set to … “Ave Maria.”
A classic indulgent “Euphoria” moment, intercut with Cassie working the room (and eventually bedroom) at the party of influencer Brandon Fontaine (Jeff Wahlberg).
Saved by the robbery!
Things were getting tense with Rue almost getting compromised in her argument at the strip club with Big Eddy (Kadeem Hardison) and Magick (Rosalía), when seemingly random thieves in Obama masks took over the back of the club. The distraction could ultimately be her way out of suspicion — but in one last twist, Rue identifies the getaway driver as Faye (Chloe Cherry), working on behalf of Laurie. Those lips don’t lie!
