Lea Seydoux’s life has been plagued by panic attacks since she was 18.
Lea Seydoux has had to live with crippling panic attacks
The 40-year-old actress – who played Bond girl Madeleine Swann in the 007 films Spectre and No Time to Die – has endured “strong panic attacks” since her late teens and she still experiences the terrifying episodes now.
In an interview with Variety, she said: “When I was 18, I had strong panic attacks. Even now, I still have strong panic attacks — and when I have a panic attack, it’s the vertigo of being yourself. I remember having a panic attack: I watched myself in the mirror, and I was like, This is me. I am myself. What I see in the mirror is actually me.”
Lea shared that she feels a sense of dissociation when watching herself on screen.
She said: “When I watch a movie with me, sometimes I’m like, Is it really me? Do I really look like this person?”
The Dune: Part Two star also opened up on what her motivation was to become an actress.
Seydoux – who has two children with partner André Meyer – admitted she has often questioned if she is a “real person” and the only way she was able to justify her being was to be captured on camera, despite her disassociation.
She said: “Sometimes I experience the feeling of being transparent. No one sees me. No one’s paying attention to me. Am I even a real person?
“I’m going to tell you something very intimate. The reason why I do this job … I never really wanted to become an actress, but I wanted to exist. The only way I found to exist was to have my image printed on a film and have the proof of my existence…
“I was like, no one really cares about me. In a way, acting — this is why it’s so important, and fundamental for me. I have this need to be seen.”
Ahead of working on her latest movie The Unknown, Lea was gripped by feelings of doubt because of her lack of formal training.
She said: “I’ve never done any theatre school. I learned to act in front of a camera.
“So I feel that I’m almost an unprofessional actor. I’ve done so many films, but I’m still sometimes like I will never be able to do this.
“[Then] something clicked — something that I understood about the character. And I was like, ‘OK — now I am David.’ I was completely transcended by this character — I was David, this man in this woman’s body. And this is what I love about cinema.”
While Lea is “curious” to see how her work is received, she ultimately finds acting a “selfish pleasure”.
She said: I am very curious to see how people will receive the movies.
“I make films for people — once I’ve done the movie, then it doesn’t belong to me anymore.
“When I act, it’s a selfish pleasure. While I’m doing the film, I’m totally in it. I give everything I can to make the character believable and human.”
