bitchy | Mail: ‘Pampered’ Princess Kate & William need to stop gurning & navel-gazing

The Daily Mail giveth and the Daily Mail taketh away. This is what’s happening after the Prince and Princess of Wales’s appearance at Sunday’s BAFTAs, their first joint appearance since Prince Andrew’s arrest last Thursday. Andrew’s arrest seemed to shake the monarchy to its very core, and even hardcore royalists are sounding republican these days. Well, the Daily Mail wants it both ways. They published a saccharine piece about Princess Kate’s diplomatic dressing at the BAFTAs, full of all of the family talking points: yadda yadda future queen, etc. On the heels of that, the Mail published a shocking takedown, a column by Liz Jones. Jones has been critical of Prince William and Kate before, but man, she really had her knives out with this one. It’s funny as hell. Some highlights from “This picture of Kate at the Baftas says it all. We are tired of reading between the lines – it’s time for the truth.”

William had to attend the BAFTAs: Of course, for William, as president of Bafta (it’s a hard job, but someone’s got to do it), it’s obligatory to turn up in a dickie bow, read from an autocue then rub shoulders with Leonardo DiCaprio. Of course Wills had to be there: cry off in the week your uncle, the former Duke of York, was arrested, his homes searched in connection with accusations of misconduct in public office, and it will look as though you too have something to hide. But the only allusion William made at the bash was to say, of the terribly tragic film Hamnet, ‘I need to be in quite a calm state and I am not at the moment. I will save it.’ Let’s unpack that. Why not just say the movie – which went on to win Best British Film and its star, Jessie Buckley, Best Actress – that is all about the loss of a child was wonderful and moving?

William’s dumb BBC Radio interview last week: In the same week his uncle was carted off to a police station, our future king went on Radio 1 to talk about his own mental health as a search and rescue helicopter pilot. During the panel discussion, Prince William said he thought it was a ‘real national catastrophe’ that male suicide was not talked about enough. He reflected on his own feelings, saying: ‘I take a long time trying to understand my emotions… and I feel like that’s a really important process…. to check in with yourself’. William’s own mental health hardly seems like the focus after a week in which the nation has been in uproar discussing what young women suffered at the hands of – allegedly – the Andrew formerly known as Prince.

The royals’ inability to read the room: On Saturday, while we were all reading, open-mouthed, essays in newspapers telling us this could be the end of the monarchy, Catherine turned up, smiling and giggling, to watch the England rugby team lose to Ireland at Twickenham. What she and William should have been doing is putting their heads together to come up with a statement far better than the one released by their spokesperson last week which claimed their ‘thoughts remain focused on the victims’.

BAFTA appearances are no longer good enough: Waving at cameras in a designer gown and jewels no longer cuts the mustard, I’m afraid. These official rock-ups shouldn’t just be counted; they need to be judged on how effective and relevant they are. What changes are made as a consequence? I was aghast, during President Trump’s state visit to the UK last year, that all Catherine could think to do with his wife Melania was to lead her onto a muddy field to patronise junior scouts who were aiming for their Go Wild badge. Once again, Kate was performing a diplomatic duty with all the global gravitas of the school run.

All Will & Waity do is navel gaze: Maybe all she and the pampered William know is how to talk to children and navel gaze. But we are adults. We need not elliptical half statements but reassurance, facts, action. I understand the couple have had a difficult 18 months. It’s natural that they want some privacy and even normality. But I forgive them less for not being blunt and open than I do Charles, who is of his mother’s era of ‘never complain, never explain’. Goodness, even the late Queen was more responsive and intuitive, stirring our spirits with a moving, televised address to the nation after Diana’s death, and during the Covid lockdown.

Gurning at a gala: William was the same after Catherine bravely, eventually, talked about her cancer diagnosis: his only utterances seemed constipated. He found 2024 to be the ‘worst year’ of his life. On a TV travel show, he said it was the ‘hardest year I’ve ever had’. Again, all about him. Not Catherine, and certainly not us. There is no time like the present for the King – but even more so William and Catherine – to prove their value. Their immense privileges cannot be bought by gurning at a gala before retreating to their mansions and palaces. We are tired of reading between the lines.

[From The Daily Mail]

My thoughts are multi-fold. Even for royal reporters/commentators inclined to promote William and Kate, there’s a great deal of skepticism that Will & Kate can get the job done at any level. It’s basically an open secret, referenced once or twice a year, that William and Kate are simply not up for the big job and that the whole thing is going to fall apart on their watch. This is also a power move from the press – even if Will and Kate have enjoyed sycophantic, fawning press for years, that ends now, especially if they’re going to be king and queen soon. Plus, I also think all of these critical pieces are simply genuine: following Prince Andrew’s arrest, people are sick of these big, dumb Windsors and their insincere gurning and tone-deaf utterances. There’s a vibe of “my god, will you shut up already?”

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.